I found this diagram on tri-athlete Lisa Graham’s blog. I really liked it. Thanks Lisa.
I think we all have to ask ourselves this question now and then. Are you happy?
Sometimes I do lose sight of what makes me happy. I get caught up with the day to day that I forget that I am fortunate in many ways.
I may not be where I want to be right now in life but I am on my way. Recognizing you’re not happy is the first step, right?
Here’s an excerpt from an article in O, The Oprah Magazine. The article is entitled 5 Things Happy People Do by Gabrielle LeBlanc. Are you practicing these 5 steps?
1. They find their most golden self
Picture happiness. What do you see? A peaceful soul sitting in a field of daisies appreciating the moment? That kind of passive, pleasure-oriented—hedonic—contentment is definitely a component of overall happiness.
2. They design their lives to bring in joy
It may seem obvious, but “people don’t devote enough time to thinking seriously about how they spend their life and how much of it they actually enjoy,” says David Schkade, PhD, a psychologist and professor of management at the University of California San Diego. In a recent study, Schkade and colleagues asked more than 900 working women to write down everything they’d done the day before. Afterward, they reviewed their diaries and evaluated how they felt at each point. When the women saw how much time they spent on activities they didn’t like, “some people had tears in their eyes,” Schkade says. “They didn’t realize their happiness was something they could design and have control over.”
3. They avoid “if only” fantasies
If only I get a better job…find a man…lose the weight…life will be perfect. Happy people don’t buy into this kind of thinking.
The latest research shows that we’re surprisingly bad at predicting what will make us happy. People also tend to misjudge their contentment when zeroing in on a single aspect of their life—it’s called the focusing illusion. In one study, single subjects were asked, “How happy are you with your life in general?” and “How many dates did you have last month?” When the dating question was asked first, their romantic life weighed more heavily into how they rated their overall happiness than when the questions were reversed.
4. They put best friends first
It’s no surprise that social engagement is one of the most important contributors to happiness. What’s news is that the nature of the relationship counts. Compared with dashing around chatting with acquaintances, you get more joy from spending longer periods of time with a close friend, according to research by Meliksah Demir, PhD, assistant professor of psychology at Northern Arizona University. And the best-friend benefit doesn’t necessarily come from delving into heavy discussions. One of the most essential pleasures of close friendship, Demir found, is simple companionship, “just hanging out,” as he says, hitting the mall or going to the movies together and eating popcorn in the dark.
5. They allow themselves to be happy
As much as we all think we want it, many of us are convinced, deep down, that it’s wrong to be happy (or too happy). Whether the belief comes from religion, culture, or the family you were raised in, it usually leaves you feeling guilty if you’re having fun.